ONE, TWO, MANY (2008)

Stuttering John Melendez went from being a once-great celebrity-crashing interviewer on The Howard Stern Show to a kind of dare-hire-announcer by Jay Leno on The Tonight Show, and watching ONE, TWO, MANY it seems like he never left Stern and had nothing to do with... while this was made... being part of the biggest late night talk show franchise ever... The latter because there are hardly any star cameos here... the kind needed that even, back in the 1970's, guerilla filmmakers like Greydon Clark would insert into his junkyard vehicles to legitimize them... Also, John's basically doing a mid-1990's Stern imitation in the simple plot-line of being obsessed with finding the perfect girl who's the perfect girl because she'll invite another girl to bed... In that he discovers who's the best thing here... who doesn't seem as cheap and contrived as the two-dollar sets that looks as if they dressed the same studio-location into apartment rooms, bathrooms and nightclubs depending on the loose script where John and his slacker buddy hang around New York City...

Enter Bellamy Young, a beautiful actress who has actually done some mainstream vehicles, and she's far too pretty for both the real John and his fictional character loosely based on him... the Stern show attack interview niche-niche fame replaced by a 15-minute run on phone commercials with a monkey... She almost makes ONE, TWO, MANY seem like it's almost a faint replica of the kind of rom-com John seems to be both parodying and celebrating with a barrage of sex-comedy relationship cliches and the kind of nasty-schlock, from one-night-stands to flatulence, that, again, was what Howard Stern pioneered into becoming so commonplace that John's movie comes across as being far more dated than risque... It's questionable why National Lampoon would produce this mess; then again the two movies between their only hits, ANIMAL HOUSE and VACATION, were MOVIE MADNESS and CLASS REUNION, two of the worst raunchy comedies ever created...  But throughout all the garbage, Ms. Young is worthy of so much more, and it's a mystery why she even wasted her time, beauty and talent here at all... but it's John alone who goes down with this ship, with his name literally written all over it.  Rating: 1/2