HOW THE WEST WAS WON (TV SERIES)

James Arness's Matt Dillon killed plenty on Gunsmoke for twenty long years, and here on HOW THE WEST WAS WON the leading man's still leading but is more a character-actor in the lead: an Indian loving mountain man who hates his own people, the whites, and thinks every Indian belch is worth more white man's gold than... white man's gold...

It's a good show that, for a season and a half, plays out like a miniseries more than a series, but the best stories go to Bruce Boxleitner as the fugitive nephew whose adventures that range from a beautiful sheriff's tough daughter Elyssa Davalos to a gang of classy villains led by Richard Basehart and Tim Matheson are entertaining as it gets... But Arness's stories, including Ricardo Montalbaun as a proud Indian who, again, is better than the evil whites, are one dimensional, which doesn't mean Arness isn't good in the role. He is good. But his stories lack story and are more preaching, so it's the young man's show here, really. Years 1976-1979 Rates: ***1/2

THE LONER (1965-1966)

Could have been a cool show, especially with Rod Serling as the writer. But he's wearing politics on his sleeve, and while many Twilight Zone episodes are cautionary tales, they relate universally.

This show, fitfully titled THE LONER, about a former soldier on an endless road happening upon various human varmints who love the thought of war without having been through it... or without having learned from what they did experience while in it... takes away from what each story could have given the viewer other than a message, which overrides each plot-line and buries the theme: to where our wandering hero seems more like a brooding know-it-all than someone making the perfect pawn upon each eclectic adventure. In other words, he has so much to teach he never actually learns anything...

And worse yet, he never seems in danger so there's little to no urgency in his would-be, world-weary travels. He simply winds up lecturing everyone not as enlightened as he is...

A lot like the political side of Hollywood, which Rod Serling was much, much better and deeper than. But he had more of a sermon to tell her than a story. See the early Gunsmoke episodes for how a great Western series should be. GRADE: C

GOIN' SOUTH

title: GOIN' SOUTH

year: 1978

cast: Jack Nicholson, Mary Steenburgen, John Belushi, Christopher Lloyd, Jeff Morris

director: Jack Nicholson

rating: ***

Jack Nicholson doing a Strother Martin imitation (stuffy-nose voice and scruffy dog persona) in a comedy/western Nicholson himself directed centering on an outlaw who, to avoid being hanged, marries a tough, classy, stubborn gal with a heart - and mine full - of gold. She uses Jack to do the menial labor, basically putting him through a sort of boot camp, in which they eventually fall in love. "Women love outlaws like little boys love stray puppies", he tells her. It's a nifty character-driven romantic comedy till the last half hour when Jack's old gang returns to steal the gold and, although trying for action, things get somewhat standard and dull. The budding romance between the lady and the tramp is what makes this movie work. The late John Belushi appears in a glorified cameo as lawman Christopher Lloyd's screaming Mexican deputy.

THE WILD BUNCH

title: THE WILD BUNCH

year: 1969

rating: ***

The first half hour thrusts you into a really cool place you don't return to again. This was a purposefully anti-Western agenda: putting what would usually be a climax up front... but things seem to meander for most of the film, especially when the Bunch goes to Mexico and loses their youngest member in a death scene that nearly lasts an hour (or at least feels that way). Warren Oates and Ben Johnson, two of my favorite actors, act like Heckle and Jeckle in some scenes. William Holden holds things together dependably. And Ernest Borgnine is... Ernest Borgnine. But my favorite character is Bo Hopkins, who plays a rogue lunatic that only lasts through the opening (seen in intense flashbacks). I wish his character would have remained throughout. This Bunch needed more Wild, and he epitomized that perfectly.

THE BALLAD OF CABLE HOGUE

year: 1970
cast: Jason Robards, Stella Stevens, David Warner, Strother Martin, L.Q. Jones
rating: ***

A little Western fable about an old drifter named Cable Hogue (Jason Robards) who is left for dead in the desert by two criminals (L.Q. Jones and Strother Martin) who steal his water. Cable wanders around mumbling to God to save him, and then finds water bubbling under the earth. David Warner plays a promiscuous travelling preacher who happens upon the waterhole. Cable leaves him there to guard his find, goes into town to put a claim on his new land where he meets wary bankers and a hooker with a heavenly body and a heart of gold, Stella Stevens. It's somewhat mediocre for a Sam Peckinpah film, but above-average for a mellow anti-Western... That is, if it weren't a Peckinpah piece carrying-in those kind of pre-set expectations, it would have possibly fared better to fans of the Western genre. Then again, since it's so different and non-violent, perhaps without the Peck stamp it would have vanished entirely.

HEAVEN'S GATE (MICHAEL CIMINO)

year: 1980

cast: Kris Kristofferson

director: Michael Cimino

rating: *

What makes Michael Cimino's infamous "Heaven's Gate" the biggest bomb in history? What makes "Heaven's Gate" one of the worst epic films ever made? Was it the four hour running time? Was it the fact that each scene went on way too long? Was it the rollerskating scene where a guy plays a fiddle for five minutes skating around the rink (a roller rink in a Western just doesn't mesh)? Was it the love story between a dull, overly-idealist town Marhsall and a plain looking prostitute and their superlong rides in a stagecoach? Was it the prologue involving graduates of Harvard giving speeches while we get numerous cuts to beautiful women who have nothing to do with the scene other than forcing us to realize that they find Kris Kristofferson sexy? Was it the dancing scenes in the same prologue that showed people spinning around endlessly without showing where the music was coming from? Was it the dialog; most of which was almost impossible to understand? Sure, these things didn't help. But what I hated most about this film is the characters: they're either really bad or really good. The bad ones, especially Sam Waterson... are so overly bad they should be wearing thin mustaches and, upon seeing them on screen, there should be an audince booing and hissing in the background. And the good guys... well, let's just say they're the polar opposite of the villains... Too good, too perfect. The polar opposite of this muddled disaster.